Enjoy the little things in life for one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
I have to vent!!
So I really have a lot of updating to do, birthdays, vacations, etc, they are coming soon. I needed to vent and get my thoughts out about this whole parenting thing. Do any of you ever feel like you suck at it. It has been one of those days. Mostly with a particular 3 year old in this house, but seriously what have I done wrong? So let me tell you how each day typically goes and specifically this one. We usually have to get up by 7 and take Brock to school which Sammi hates and usually fights me on putting shoes on or just getting to the car, but today we actually didn't have to do that we got to sleep in so I thought, when all 3 were up at 6:30. Brock and Sammi start out the day with a fight about who made there bed first since the night before Brock decided whoever did it first could choose the Wii game they could play. I usually help Sammi since it is hard for her, but I tried to stay in bed as long as possible. Brock broke down and helped her do it, I think so she would stop crying. Then we had the usual fight of taking her pull up off in the morning. Then breakfast was not the right pancakes as Sammi stated, she wanted rolled up. Then it was time to take Brock to school for his cute Dance festival and Sammi didn't have her shoes on and didn't know where they were so after patiently waiting she found the ones she used to help pull weeds on Saturday and dirt is now all throughout the house. We got to the school and Sammi played for a minute at the park. While the kids got together for thier dances. She then sat while she watched and had snacks. Once it was over she wanted to play for another minute so I let her play for a minute then we had to get Brock from his class to go. It was a full out set Briggs down and drag her off the swings while crying the whole time. In the mean time she lost her gum and was mad about that. We got home and she got to play with her cute little friend Dylan for a minute with his mom at the park. Then Dylans mom walked them back to our house and they played for a minute downstairs. It was time for Dylan to go and Brock was going to his friends house. Sammi didn't want to stay home. I said I'm sorry Sammi but you need to stay home and rest we can put a movie on. She was not having it. She put her shoes on and next thing you know she is running as fast as she can down the street towards Dylan's and away from me. She was half way down the block when I took off with no shoes and Briggs in hand after her. Brock took off on his scooter to help but it took him two trys to catch her. She was almost to the end of the street when Brock sits on her to keep her from moving. She is mad, in pain, and I am sure scared. I get to her and tell her she needs to listen and we are going home. I grab her hand and walk back home still holding poor Briggs. The whole time she is screaming and hitting me. So I tell her she may not play outside anymore today and put her in her room still screaming at the top of her lungs. She unlocks the door and comes out so I drag her up there again. She is now asleep on the floor of course. But, seriously, how do I avoid these battles every day? I am trying to be patient but she makes me so mad. I say a little prayer every time to help me be patient and to know how to handle the situation, but it is still hard. Well if anything I vented about it, but truly a litte advice, tips, ideas, or suggestions would be awesome. Barrett says it is just the girl thing, but I really don't think that is it. She really wants to do everything Brock does and he is 6 so he can play longer and more then she can. I don't know, but it is a daily struggle and hopefully she will grow out of it. Thanks for listening and more interesting posts will come.
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6 comments:
Oh Ashley, I'm sorry. I think it's partially a girl thing, but then I know a certain nephew of yours that likes to push his mother's buttons too! It really will get better. Does she act that way for Barret too? Or just you? You might just have to put limits on everything she does. When her behavior improves she can get something, even if that something happens to be a toy that has been taken away, that she earns back. Hang in there.
Oh gosh, I feel for you. I have watched some of the "Nanny" show and when the kids have inappropriate behavior, they always put them in time out. If the kids leave the specified time out place, they are put back, and put back until they can stay there for the time period, one minute for each year old. They are told they are not behaving appropriately, hitting is unacceptable, running away down the street by herself, temper tantrum or whatever it is they are doing and they need to be in time out. When they have completed the time out, you tell them to say they are sorry. It is something that she will test you on over and over, but be strong and give her boundries. Children can learn what behavior is acceptable and unacceptable. Yes, praise them when their behavior is what you desire. You are not doing anything wrong, you just have a child with a mind of her own, wanting to grow up fast.
Geeze!!! I'm so happy its not just me that goes through the 3yr. old battle almost every day! I think if you are consisent with time outs (Brianna is on time out I swear like 10 times a day sometimes!!!)& make sure you spend time with just her, I do notice a difference with Brianna's attitude a bit. We also started a sticker chart for brianna & she can earn a sticker every time she listens & obeys & then if she earns 10 stickers she gets to pick out a prize at the store. Seems to be working pretty well so far. But still, its so hard when they want to be big like their older sibblings, want to do EVERYTHING themselves but still throw temper tantrums like a 2 yr. old! I totally know how you feel. I think 3 yr. olds are harder than 2 yr. olds! Anyway, hang in there & know there's others of us out here struggling right along with you! Sorry for such a long comment!!
Amy
Oh Ash, I'm sorry. That sounds like a bad day. Hopefully she will grow out of it!! I like the book Positive Disicipline it has helped me, just a thought. Good luck!!
I don't even know what to tell you because I have the worlds craziest two year old boy. So when you get the parenting and discipplin figured out, let me know! But seriously, I have most days where I feel guilty for being a mean mom, so just don't be too hard on yourself!
I am going through the same thing here with Shelby. I swear when she turned 3, she went crazy. She doesn't listen, she talks back, says rude things, etc. I don't know if it's a girl thing, or a 2nd child thing, but whatever it is, it is hard to deal with. Everyone just keeps saying it will get better and I am just like you, I keep saying prayers in my head to keep patient and deal with her correctly. Lately, we've been talking a lot about nice Shelby vs. mean Shelby and how much mommy likes nice Shelby. She seems to really respond if I praise the good behavior and make a huge deal about that. I also do time out like other people have talked about. I think being consistent is huge and I sometimes lack at that. Good luck...let me know if you find anything that works!!!
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